A good toast is like the first sip of a cold beer—it's simply a must. Whether you're pre-drinking with friends, at your cousin's wedding, or at a traditional get-together: with a funny toast , you not only raise the glass, but also the mood.
What is a toast?
A toast is a short, often humorous saying said when toasting or while drinking. Some are profound, others completely crazy – but they all have one goal: to laugh, toast, and celebrate together. The perfect start to a legendary evening.
Funny toast – because life is too short for boring glasses
Who says you always have to be serious while drinking? A funny toast will get everyone laughing and make every round at the table unforgettable. Here are a few classics:
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"Alcohol may not be the answer, but at least you forget the question!"
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"Let's stop drinking and start boozing!"
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"Alcohol, you noble spirit, how often you bring me down..."
The crazier the toast , the better the souvenir photo afterwards – if there even is one.
🏆 Top 10 toasts - Our favorites
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Alcohol, you noble spirit, no matter how many times you knock me down, knock me down ten more times – I'll get up and drink again!
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Everything is transient, only thirst lasts a lifetime.
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Once your reputation is ruined, you can drink without any shame.
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From the middle to the tits to the balls – zap, zap!
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A girl and a glass of wine cure all ailments. And whoever doesn't drink and whoever doesn't kiss is as good as dead.
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Water makes you wise, wine makes you happy – so we drink both, to be both.
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Even if your birthday hands are shaking, a shot of schnapps will calm them down immensely. You only have ten fingers, so drink – and then sink into a blissful intoxication.
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Don’t waste any time talking – get your head in the neck!
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Hops and malt – straight down your throat!
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Don't drink, don't die – then there won't be any beer, that would be boring, oh yeah!
🍻 Funny toasts – the full load
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Alcohol, you noble spirit, no matter how many times you knock me down, knock me down ten more times, I'll get up and drink again. Cheers!
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Everything is transient, only thirst lasts a lifetime.
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Alcohol may make your head hollow, but then there's more room for alcohol.
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If you like love and unity, you'll also enjoy a little drink.
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Let's stop drinking and start boozing.
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A dog and a pig got married. The result of their merrymaking is us drunken bastards.
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Once your reputation is ruined, you can drink without any shame.
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Mankind's greatest enemy is and remains alcohol. But the Bible says: "You shall also love your friends."
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Delirium, delarium, full as an aquarium.
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Dear moon, you have it tough, you have every reason to complain. You are only full twelve times a year – I am full every day.
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It hurts my heart so much when I see the bottom of the glass.
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From the middle to the tits to the balls, zack, zack!
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Sport is murder – only fuel keeps you fit.
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Caipi Beck's and Jägermeister, these are our spirits.
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Our last wish – more and more alcohol!
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Some days life can only be endured when you're completely drunk.
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Don’t waste any time talking – get your head in the neck!
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My greatest enemy is alcohol. But the Bible says, "Love your enemies too."
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Better a belly from drinking than a hump from working.
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Alcohol isn't the answer, but at least you forget the question.
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From the cradle to the grave, booze is the only thing that matters.
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We're sitting here at the round table – and drinking until it's square.
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The little man's sunshine: fucking and getting drunk.
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Better in the darkest bar than at the brightest job.
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Yesterday I quit drinking – today I'm celebrating my comeback!
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Refill instead of thinking.
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Alcohol shortens your life by half – but you see everything twice.
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Man drinks, horse drinks – but today it is the other way around.
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As a child, I blushed at every opportunity – today I blush at every opportunity.
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You can never drink too much—but you can never drink enough! (Gotthold Ephraim Lessing)
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“Eating is a need of the stomach, drinking is a need of the soul.” (Claude Tillier)
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Hops and malt – straight down your throat!
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Better to sit on one than miss one.
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Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
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The level is stable – the rest is wobbly.
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I'll never drink again... without you!
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If the farmer milks his bull, the idiot drank too much beer.
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Drinking is a vice – but a beautiful one.
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If you are blind after throwing up, the headwind was too strong!
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I'm not drunk! I'm naturally loud, funny, and clumsy!
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A man without a belly is a cripple!
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No one can refuse a glass of wine.
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Where drinking is an honor, vomiting can be no disgrace!
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Everyone has to believe in something – I think I’ll have another drink!
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What used to be my liver is now a minibar.
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Sober I'm shy - but drunk I'm great!
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Come on – never give up!
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An empty stomach is a bad advisor – so cheers and dig in!
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Get rid of that shit!
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Always be happy and never angry – this will prolong your lifespan.
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I drink ouzo – what do you drink?
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Better grain in the blood than straw in the head!
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Those who waver get more out of the journey.
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Don't praise your beer before you have a hangover!
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Memory gaps are the jackpot at the bottom of a vodka bottle.
🍺 Funny drinking sayings with beer
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"Everyone has to believe in something. I think I'll have another beer!"
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“Water is also a noble drink when mixed with malt and hops.”
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“Hops and malt, God bless them!”
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"Moses knocked on a stone, and water immediately turned into wine. But you're much more comfortable here; all you have to do is call out: Innkeeper, a beer!"
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“Two beers are better than one – that’s math you can understand.”
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"The first beer quenches my thirst. The second cheers me up. After three, I don't care about anything else—so I just keep drinking."
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“A mug of beer is the best psychologist.”
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“Beer makes you smart – too much makes you blue.”
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“If the farmer milks his bull, the idiot drank too much beer.”
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“The biggest advantage of beer: no red wine stains!”
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“The smart person, I tell you, doesn’t talk – he drinks his beer.”
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“A beer in the morning and the day is yours.”
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“There’s always room for a pilsner between the liver and the spleen.”
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“Liquid bread makes cheeks red!”
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“Instead of heating, I’d rather have a wheat beer!”
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“My head hurts, my feet stink – it’s high time to have a beer!”
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“Beer is delicious, beer is great – I prefer to be drunk!”
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“Anyone who gives away beer will be hanged!”
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"I'm tired, I'm going to rest, cover my beer belly. Father, let the hangover go, don't be so cruel tomorrow!"
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“He who sows hops will reap beer.” – Wolf Dietrich
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“Ex and hopp – in the head!”
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“It’s all lost!”
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“Get me a bottle of beer, or I’ll strike out!” – Gerhard Schröder
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“When I touch your neck, when I bring your mouth to mine – oh, how I long for you, beloved bottle of beer!”
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“Don’t be shabby – raise your mug!”
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“Beer belly? I can do that too!”
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“A beer always goes well with liver and kidneys!”
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“A beer in the morning drives away sorrow and worries.”
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“The first beer of the day is like the sun – it rises and makes everything better.”
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"No beer before four? Come on, it's always four somewhere!"
🥳 Birthday toasts – Cheers to many more years
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Let's raise a glass in joy, and may our celebrant live. Free from worries and full of enjoyment—that's possible, no, it's a must!
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Let the full glasses ring out, toast your friend. Fill your glasses again – drink to your friend's health!
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When birthday joys beckon, it's okay to have a drink. There's truth in wine, as tradition says—so stick to it and do it!
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You shall live 100 years, to that we raise a glass. Farewell, live it well – and it's best to stay drunk!
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Cheers! May everyone now reach for a beer and our anniversary celebration matures for another year.
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Even if your birthday hands are shaking, a shot of schnapps will calm them down immensely. You only have ten fingers, so drink – and then sink into a blissful intoxication.
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To the birthday child, raise a glass. A big toast – cheers to everyone!
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We raise our glasses and drink to you – and do good, certainly.
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I'm giving you the greatest gift by thinking of you with every sip. Cheers and all the best!
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The years pass, the wine matures – oh, if only every day could be my birthday!
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Fully drunk, we raise a glass to you, another year gone by – and you're less fresh.
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Instead of many words and big speeches – let’s raise a glass!
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To your health, to your life, may you give us many more rounds!
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Here's to life, love, and a year full of happiness—and, of course, a cold beer!
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A toast for every year, and a beer for every toast!
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On your special day, we drink whatever the barrel can hold.
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show: those who have more of them live longer – cheers to that!
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Grab the glass and drink the wine – may everyone here be happy!
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Let’s raise your glasses to cheers for the birthday child!
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Whether I'll live tomorrow, I don't know. But if I live tomorrow, I know for sure that I'll drink tomorrow. (Gotthold Ephraim Lessing)
🍻 Short & snappy toasts
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Cheers everyone!
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Raise your glasses!
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Cheers, you idiot!
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Cheers!
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Prostate!
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Ex and hopp, into the head.
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Refill instead of thinking!
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Get rid of that shit!
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One, two, three – Gsuffa!
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With that in mind – off into the gutter!
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Sober I'm shy, but drunk I'm great!
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Where my liver used to be, there is now a minibar.
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Sport is murder, only fuel keeps you fit.
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Thirst comes with drinking.
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Cheers you idiots!
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We'll never be together again when we're that young.
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Don't drink, don't die – then there'll be no beer, that would be boring, oh yeah! 🍻
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Adam, I'd love a Bavarian beer right now, otherwise dying will be difficult for me. 🍺
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A toast, a toast – a bottle of beer, and we'll be in a good mood here! 🍷
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To the women! Zack! Zack! Zack!
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No more chatting, just get your head back!
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This glass to the good spirit. – Friedrich Schiller
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Eating takes, drinking gives enthusiasm. – Jean Paul
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The drink takes away our worries – but only until tomorrow.
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Let's not die, we have a Bavarian beer! Here's to fun, to joy, to life and to death! 🍻
🍷 Wine toasts – from noble to boozy
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“If you take your drop every day, your heart will always beat cheerfully, and in old age you will be like wine, always desirable and cheerful.”
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"Water is the ox's strength, man drinks wine and barley juice. So I toast with beer and wine—who would want to be an ox?"
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“Take the glass and drink the wine – everyone should be happy!”
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"Water makes one wise, wine makes one merry. So let us drink both, to be both."
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“The good Lord did not want fine wine to spoil. Therefore, he added the necessary thirst to the juice of the vines.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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“Where vines entwine with ardent growth – so my thoughts are: love everything here.”
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“We can do without many things – but hardly wine and handsome men (or ladies).”
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“The world is reflected in wine – but those who philosophize too much quickly forget it.”
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“He who made the vines grow also knows that one must enjoy.”
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“Life is too short to drink bad wine.”
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"When birthday joys beckon, it's okay to have a drink. There's truth in wine, tradition tells us—so stick to it and do it!"
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“Vinum bonum deorum donum.” (Latin: A good wine is a gift from the gods.)
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“Whoever rejects you, O noble wine, is not worthy to be called a man.”
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“He who drinks should have a pure heart – wine is not to be trifled with.”
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"He who drinks wine sleeps well. He who sleeps well does not sin. He who does not sin will be blessed. He who drinks wine will therefore be blessed." – loosely adapted from Shakespeare
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“If you want to find the truth in wine, you must not give up after the first glass.” – Werner Mitsch
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“Happy holidays and beautiful days – a wine from the best location.”
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“In wine lies truth, joy and comfort – so fill your glasses and let’s say: Cheers!”
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"We must all be drunk! Youth is drunkenness without wine. If age drinks itself back to youth, it is a wonderful virtue."
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“Rain makes the grass grow, wine makes the conversation.”
🥂 Wedding toasts – For love, life and empty glasses
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A girl and a glass of wine cure all ailments.
And whoever doesn't drink and whoever doesn't kiss is as good as dead. -
Let’s raise a glass – long may the bride and groom live!
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Because my opinion is not exaggerated:
He who cannot drink should not love.
But you drinkers should not think yourselves better –
If you can't love, you shouldn't drink! -
You are now one, both of you – and we are one with you.
Drink a glass of good wine to celebrate your joy! -
Be happy here and there, be blessed because you are praised –
you who are called bride and groom today.
Be husband and wife tomorrow, be parents throughout the year –
So you have attained what was to be attained. -
Water makes you wise, wine makes you happy –
So we drink both to be both. -
If you like love and unity, you'll also have a little drink now and then.
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I fill my glass with alcohol at home –
I congratulate the newlyweds and drink to their health! -
Do not ask what fate will decide tomorrow –
The moment is ours, let's enjoy it! -
Great love stories start with champagne – and end with herbal tea.
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A good bite deserves a good drink.
If you eat well, you should also drink well. -
Always be happy and never angry –
this extends your lifespan. -
Love, when it is new, effervesces like a young wine –
The older she gets, the clearer and quieter she will be. -
And remain turned towards one another at all times –
May strife and discord never disturb your union. -
Cheers to the couple getting married today –
May love and wine never spoil you. -
Grab the glass and drink the wine –
everyone should be happy! -
A dog and a pig entered into a marriage –
The result of this merry group is us drunken bastards. -
Love and wine – the two best reasons to never get married sober.
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Two glasses in hand – better than cold feet at the altar!
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Connected in love, united in ecstasy – to what life still has to offer you!
🌍 International toasts – cheers around the world
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🇬🇧 England: Cheers! – Cheers!
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🇫🇷 France: À votre santé! – To your health!
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🇮🇹 Italy: Salute! / Cin cin! – Cheers! / Clink glasses
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🇪🇸 Spain: ¡Salud! – Health!
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🇵🇹 Portugal: Saúde! - Health!
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🇳🇱 Netherlands: Voor het voordeel! – Here’s to the advantage!
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🇸🇪🇳🇴🇩🇰 Scandinavia: Skål! – bowl! (historical drinking vessel)
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🇫🇮 Finland: Kippis! – Cheers!
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🇬🇷 Greece: Jámas! – To our health!
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🇹🇷 Turkey: Şerefe! – To your honor!
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🇵🇱 Poland: Well Zdrowie! - For the benefit!
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🇷🇺 Russia: Na Zdorov'ye! – To your health!
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🇨🇳 China: Gānbēi! (干杯) – Empty glass!
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🇯🇵 Japan: Kanpai! – Dry Cups!
